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first off…
in the last entry i totally spaced
one of the reasons queen made
my list AND why they rule:
FREDDIE MERCURY’S VOICE!
it was powerful and dynamic
and… totally otherworldly!

ok… moving on to the number 9
artist in my top 10 list of ‘greatest artists ever’
(based of the list VH1 gave me)

VAN HALEN.

controversial, i know.
fact is, van halen never really gets the respect they deserve.
maybe it’s the years of drama/feuding of the various band members.
or the genre they’re in.
or david lee roth.
i don’t know…
but here are the reasons they rule:

- DAVID LEE ROTH!
have we ever had a front man, before or since,
who encompassed as much sexuality, humor, showmanship,
fearlessness and power as diamond dave?
he owned the stage.
he owned the arena.
he owned the songs.
his singing/shtick was JUST as important as eddie’s playing.
who else gets away with talking about ‘forgetting his pencil’
and ‘easing the seat back’ in his car in a hit song?
he was the ringleader of the party.
that EVERYONE was invited to.

- no one has ever been able to imitate them.
sure, people have jacked certain elements…
but there’s never been a band that’s ever been accused
of ‘doing the van halen thing.’ cause no one can.

- never has a band taken so seriously the idea of NOT being serious…
and in the process, been such ABSOLUTE musical BAD-ASSES!
it’s like… if the 3 stooges were ninjas.
laughing, shtick-ing it up for a crowd of people and then, mid joke,
killing everyone.

- van halen switched singers mid-career and wrote songs that were
JUST AS STRONG. and they sold more records. and became more popular.
(note: this did not work a third time. sorry, gary cherone)

- the songs.
the DLR era van halen songs were completely non-traditional,
completely intuitive, 100% unique and totally transported you
to a different place.
(again… spoken word verses about pencils in ‘hot for teacher?!’ amazing!)
and i happen to think the sammy hagar-era songs were amazing too.
‘dreams,’ ‘when it’s love,’ ‘poundcake,’ ‘finish what ya started’…
those are bulletproof pop rock songs.

- last, but not least.
EDDIE VAN HALEN!!
melodic. fearless. from the gut.
i’ve never heard him play a note i didn’t like.
people have emulated his speed. his technique
but no one can PLAY like him.
he’s dirty. and sexy. and groovy.
he plays like he’s falling down stairs…
in the SEXIEST POSSIBLE WAY a person can fall down stairs.
his sense of melody is UNREAL.
he was the last person to really change the way the guitar is played.
and, for me, there has never been a better guitar player.
(hendrix/clapton/jimmy page/whoever fans… start your booing now.)

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