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waiting.

how does paul simon get away with singing
words like ‘tucson, arizona’, and ‘bodyguard’,
and lines like ‘fat charlie the arc angel sloped
into the room…’??
it’s not fair.

these amazing, jagged, words.
like the everlasting gob stopper from willy wonka
different parts, colors and shapes, jutting out.
and he makes it work.
and as the listener, we take it in. without question.
without getting stabbed in the cheek, or breaking a tooth.

“a man walks down the street.
it’s a street in a strange world.
maybe it’s the third world,
maybe it’s his first time around
he doesn’t speak the language,
he holds no currency,
he is a foreign man,
he is surrounded by the sound,
the sound
of cattle in the market place,
scatterlings and orphanages
he looks around, around,
he sees angels in the architecture
spinning in infinity,
he says Amen!, and Hallelujah!”

are you fucking kidding me?! that’s the verse?!
orphanages? cattle? architecture?
ugh.

my new songs are slow to finish. strong start, then… phfff.
it’s the lyrics, mostly.
but melodies too.
every time i move towards them, they scatter…like deer.
toxic deer crossbred with fucking wolverines.
so you sit there, give space, and if you’re lucky they show up.
then when they do come, if you’re not careful, they maul you.
and so i wait. and try not to try.
try to not let their space get encroached on.
try and stay open.

i went to the rock and roll hall of fame twice last week.
i think that is for another entry, actually…
but my point here is, i went and i was blown open. again.
completely kicked in and re-ignited by the power of music.
of songs. of performances.
then i sit, with my guitar. my notebook, lit on fire,
trying SO HARD to get what i love so much to come through me.
trying to drag theses songs out.
and end up with nothing worth nothing.

i know, i know…  it’s not about trying.
i know it’s actually the opposite.
but that’s hard to remember when you’re burning.

18 Responses to “waiting.”

  1. Leighellen Says:

    This was perfect. I think you should write a song about the waiting and the burning. Although, people might think it’s about an STD. Sorry, not the right place for humor. Seriously, songs about nothing are the best songs. Stop trying and just start writing about what you’re feeling. That’s why your songs kick ASS. They are brutally honest and people can relate to that side of you.

  2. Faith Says:

    The way you write is beautiful, even here when you feel you can’t write.
    “that’s hard to remember when you’re burning”
    That really strikes a chord.
    Your lyrics always amaze me, I’m sure it will come, and will bring that something extra into my life.
    Good luck.
    And as for Paul Simon, I’m not sure he got away with orphanages, but the greatest line is surely “He ducked back down the alley with some roly-poly little bat faced girl” (I knew that girl in school, I swear).

  3. Jbell Says:

    Maybe you just need to write a song about the gobstopper, or the mutated deer to get it out of your system. Then laugh hysterically, relax, and let the next song find you. Like, say, in a spring storm. :)

  4. Kaja Says:

    More songs about Ice Cream! Saw you in Palm Beach last night and REALLY enjoyed it. We all agreed you were the most engaging and pleasurable artist that we saw and heard throughout Sunfest. And I promise you, not just a group of teen girls, pretty eclectic group of all ages, sizes, backgrounds, geographical locations, genders, and musical preferences!! Keep it up!

  5. rach Says:

    you consistently amaze me.
    as for the stumpages with the new songs…you could always mash them together a la ‘a day in the life’ although this must be something youve already thought of, sometimes the most obvious thing requires pointing out…

    i cant wait to hear them!

  6. Jess Says:

    Maybe that’s the whole point, the whole deer thing. I understand though, you feel like you just have an idea of what it looks like and it disappears before you can get down all the details. You’ll get it soon enough, once you can get to a quiet place in your mind.

  7. Ivy Says:

    the rock hall is always a great place to go to be inspired. i lose sense of time when i’m there. you’re song will work out, and i cannot wait for the next album. rock on.

  8. katrina Says:

    1 - He’s kind of guaranteed a big finish with “amen and halleluja”, don’t you think? (he’s a SOOPER-genius and I love him, but come on - it’s a gimme)

    2 - I listened to the iTunes live version of “…Noisy Hearts” on repeat in DC traffic today until the guy in the car idling next to me said “who sings that song?”, so that’s gotta be worth something, yes?

  9. Shannon T. Says:

    Your music is great, the lyrics beautiful. I don’t think anyone great every truly thinks they are great, at least not in those insecure moments, when you are alone. Creativity is a strange thing. I write myself, as an outlet, and I know what it’s like to feel that pull, and you know something is there, but like a balloon on the breeze it remains out of grasp. Maybe you need a muse? Just a thought. :)

  10. Gina Says:

    I understand the frustration, especially after getting inspired. I’m a Graphic Design student and will have an idea for a painting or another project, but when I sit down to create it that damn blank piece of paper just continues to stare back at me - daring me to touch it. Then I get frustrated and it all just snowballs. But it is those moments when the creativity is a flowin’ and you just can’t get enough of it down that keeps me coming back to that blank piece of paper every time. I’m sure its the same with songwriting. Hang in there… :)

  11. Shai Says:

    Your blogs and lyrics rock. You are writing your songs everywhere! “I taste the sparks on your tongue” was the line that won me as a permanent fan. Not everyone knows this even happens, so to hear it in a song was wonderful for me.
    thanks!

  12. jodi Says:

    -but that’s just it, Matt. YOu don’t give yourself enough credit! You never cease to amaze me! I sit and I listen to you say( on live from “Daryl’s house”) “can I just get one of these?”- you were talking about a killer song- a classic , like private eyes -and I say- YOU HAVE DONE IT! And I’m not just talking about “come on get higher”. In the course of a year you have turned me into a groupie!!!!!!!!! Let me just say that the Deep Rock performance is sooooooooooooooooooooo awesome. Private eyes nothing. (and I am a big Hall and Oates fan) So, keep up the good work!By the way, I wonder if u remember me?- I met u in Newburyport Ma. last year and u said Jodi is DABOMB!

  13. MAURA Says:

    MATT,

  14. Michele Says:

    Watch this:

    http://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_gilbert_on_genius.html

    … oh, and ole to you. :)

  15. Tim Says:

    When I was in high school I was too busy drooling over vintage Paul Simon to get laid. Somehow reading this I feel strangely vindicated. Not really. I love that there is still someone listening to the Graceland album. Everytime I stumble on it in my dusty CD case its like finding a $20 in pants that I haven’t worn.

    We’ve been all over to see Matt. Tonight he’s 20 minutes away, and we couldn’t make the show. I’m bummed.

  16. Les Gyulay Says:

    When I first read this post I was laughing because these are almost the same words I thought about your music. Who puts together words like “violent, sweet perfect words”? I figured you must know this woman I adore because that’s the way she talks - you’ve totally captured her. But seriously, who puts together those words, in song, blog, phone message, grafitti…? How do you get away with it, and how do I get a fraction of the mojo to communicate like that?

  17. Lauren Says:

    Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. What an impressive place to go. I live in Cleveland now, doing the grad school thing. It always amazes me to go in there and feel shock and awe over seeing the same things. There’s a little theater in the museum that shows clips of Jimmy Hendrix playing in different concerts. How does one arrive at such greatness?

    Anyway, I went to a few of your shows at John Carroll. I was really impressed. You have great stage presence and lyrics that can really relate to people.

    Good luck with your future endeavors!

  18. maura Says:

    sometimes i wonder if you wrote this partially to see if anyone REALLY heard you last summer? graceland-june2008

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